A few days back, my husband received a whatsapp message and was in bits of laughter after reading it. Before his eyes could reach the last line of the message, he had started forwarding it to all his whatsapp groups. And the last of all, he forwarded it to me, even though I was sitting just next to him on the bed. When my mobile beeped, he grinned at me like a cheshire cat. The message read :
'ARMY OFFICER KI SHAADI KA PUNCHNAMA
-------------------------------------
1 COURSEMATE TO OTHER AFTER A FEW DRINKS...
"How's your married life?"
Kabhi kisi ko 2 CO k under kaam karte dekha hai...Mujhe dekh le
Shaadi se pehle wow u r in army, ur life is so tough, ur uniform is so smart wow so proud of u.
Shaadi k baad ye poore din office main kya karte ho, TD pe aapko hi kyun jaana hai, EWT mein main kyun nahi chal sakti saath mein, agar saal mein 6 mahine bahar hi rehna tha toh mujhe kyun laaye yaha.
Sabse zyada dimaag ki dahi is AWWA ne kar rakhi hai. India ka nahi ISI ka haatha hai isme. Ye itni meeting kyun hoti hain, ye kaisa welfare hai, aaj uski biwi nahi aayi welfare mein, yeh AWWA meet itni boring kyun hoti hain....
Saariyaan...saari ki shopping khatam nahi hoti inki...aur ek saree ko dusree baar pehnengi nahi...roz dimaag chaatengi aap naya shirt le lo, apne liye toh kuch lete hi nahi ho...phir mall mein jaa kar 4 saree utha laayengi aur phir dimaag chaatengi ki khud k liye kuch lelo.
Ab inka pati ambani ya adani toh hai nahi ki roz saree bhi dila de aur phir bhi paise bach jaaye.
Uske baad ghar late aao to inhe jawaab do, tum toh chaahte hi nahi ho mere sath time spend karna, tum toh khud TD jaana chaahte ho, shaadi se pehle toh bada phone karte the, ab kya ho gaya.
To kya karoon...puri zindagi 'Lt' hi rahu ya bhagoda ho jaun.
2 ghante pehle phone kar k bol diya ki shaam ko party hai, kitna mushkil hai baat samajhna. Office se bhaagte hue aao toh dekho koi taiyaar hi nahi hai, phir 5 min mein khud taiyaar ho, unhe taiyaar karo...makeup khatam nahi hota inka. Aisa kya lagaati hain muh pe, ab ek hi din mein aishwarya toh ban nahi jayengi.
Is sab k baad bhi agar bhaagte bhaagte time pe pahunch gaye toh aapki toh koi planning hi nahi hai, aap toh sab casually lete ho, aapke PART D k exam clear nahi hai, Maj...k toh sab clear hain, aap staff kab clear karoge, aapki achhi city miein posting kyun nahi aati, Delhi kyun nahi posting karwa lete, aap CO kab banoge. Ab mujhe kya pata meri maa kab banunga, 1 din mein toh ban jaunga nahi. Delhi posting kara lo ab mera sasur toh defense minister laga nahi hai jo main fauj ka damaad hun....it's ridiculous yaar.'
So this was the reason for his grin - he had found his fellow-sufferers who gave him voice. But he did not know then that 'picture abhi bhi baaki thi', when the feminist in me decided to turn the coin to it's other side and pen down the reply; after all everyone has got the right to defend oneself. So here's the response to all the officers who zealously relate to the above 'heartrending' story :
ARMY WIVES KI SHAADI SHUDA ZINDAGI KA PUNCHNAMA
-----------------------------------------------
1 army wife to other after a drink..
how's your married life?
kabhi kisi ko engineering se passout hoke aanganwadi ki class attend karte dekha hai....Mujhe dekh le
Shaadi se pehle wow u cleared AIEEE, you are so beautiful, tum office aur ghar dono kaise manage kar leti ho, how did u clean those viruses, bravo girl.
Shaadi k baad
Tum pure din ghar mein karti kya ho, tumko dress pe stars lagane bhi nahi aate, aaj fir tumne wahi daal bana di, ye military presentation hai tumhari samajh m nahi aayegi, agar saal mein 6 mahine bina husband k nahi reh sakti toh mujhse shaadi hi q ki.
Sabse zyada dimaag ki dahi is AWWA ne kar rakhi hai. tumko usme jana hi padega, CO ki wife tumko bula rahi hai, senior ladies hongi jeans nahi saree pehen k jao, jawano ki wives ka khayal rakhna tumhara farz hai, CO ki wife ne kaha hai toh tumko vriksharopan project mein part lena hi padega.
Sharaab..Sharaab ki shopping khatam hi nahi hoti inki...aur ek bottle ko kabhi kholenge bhi nahi...roz dimaag chaatenge k mere salary khatam ho gayi hai tumko kaha se dun paise...aur fir CSD jaake 4 nayi bottle utha laayenge aur fir dimaag chaatenge k paise nahi hai.
Ab inke yaha koi kuber ka ped laga hua hai k roz daaru ki bottle utha laaye aur paise khatam na ho. Uske baad khana lagane mein thoda late ho jao ya subah 5 baje PT pe jaane se pehle chai na de pao toh fir inki suno, tum rehne do main bina khaaye hi chala jaunga, pehle toh meri ek phone call pe uth jaya karti thi, ab alarm bajne pe bhi nahi uth paati ho, toh kya karu pure din kitchen mein hi khadi rahu ya chaukidaar ki tarah jagti rahu.
2 ghante pehle phone karke bol diya k shaam ko party hai. Office mein baith k phone karne mein toh koi mushkil nahi hai. Office se wapas aake dekho tab pata chalega k 2 ghante mein tumhare bacho ka homework bhi karana hai, unka khana banana hai, unke kapde kal k liye laundry karne hai, tumhare party k kapde ready karne hai, tumhari uniform kal k liye ready karne hai, tumhare kutte ko khana dena hai, aur kal subah k breakfast ki taiyari karni hai...aur din raat tumhari seva karne se jo dark circles ho gaye hain ab unko chupaane k liye make up bhi na
lagaye...baad mein tum hi kahoge...Col...ki wife toh abhi bhi itni sundar lagti hain aur apni toh..
In sab k baad bhi agar bhagte bhagte time pe pahunch gaye toh..wo Col..ki wife hain jao jaake unko hello bol k aao..wo Brig..ki wife hain unse sahi se baat karna...tumne toh naak kata di...tumne Maj.. ki wife ko call kiya k nahi wo tumhare baare mein puch rahi thi..tumne meri handbook bana di k nahi mujhe aaj submit karni hai...aaj maine sabko cocktail party pe bula liya hai coz aaj saturday hai...tum aaj ek ghante mein dinner bana lo...maine bachelors ko bula liya hai...Mrs...ne pichli baar bahut achha pudding banaya tha tum waisa kab banaogi..ab mujhe kya pata main kab banaungi..ab ek din mein engineer se chef toh ban nahi jaungi...
it's ridiculous yaar.
I still sometimes ask my husband to forward this to all his whatsapp groups, on which he diligently changes the topic and asks me if I would like to have some meal cooked by him.
'ARMY OFFICER KI SHAADI KA PUNCHNAMA
-------------------------------------
1 COURSEMATE TO OTHER AFTER A FEW DRINKS...
"How's your married life?"
Kabhi kisi ko 2 CO k under kaam karte dekha hai...Mujhe dekh le
Shaadi se pehle wow u r in army, ur life is so tough, ur uniform is so smart wow so proud of u.
Shaadi k baad ye poore din office main kya karte ho, TD pe aapko hi kyun jaana hai, EWT mein main kyun nahi chal sakti saath mein, agar saal mein 6 mahine bahar hi rehna tha toh mujhe kyun laaye yaha.
Sabse zyada dimaag ki dahi is AWWA ne kar rakhi hai. India ka nahi ISI ka haatha hai isme. Ye itni meeting kyun hoti hain, ye kaisa welfare hai, aaj uski biwi nahi aayi welfare mein, yeh AWWA meet itni boring kyun hoti hain....
Saariyaan...saari ki shopping khatam nahi hoti inki...aur ek saree ko dusree baar pehnengi nahi...roz dimaag chaatengi aap naya shirt le lo, apne liye toh kuch lete hi nahi ho...phir mall mein jaa kar 4 saree utha laayengi aur phir dimaag chaatengi ki khud k liye kuch lelo.
Ab inka pati ambani ya adani toh hai nahi ki roz saree bhi dila de aur phir bhi paise bach jaaye.
Uske baad ghar late aao to inhe jawaab do, tum toh chaahte hi nahi ho mere sath time spend karna, tum toh khud TD jaana chaahte ho, shaadi se pehle toh bada phone karte the, ab kya ho gaya.
To kya karoon...puri zindagi 'Lt' hi rahu ya bhagoda ho jaun.
2 ghante pehle phone kar k bol diya ki shaam ko party hai, kitna mushkil hai baat samajhna. Office se bhaagte hue aao toh dekho koi taiyaar hi nahi hai, phir 5 min mein khud taiyaar ho, unhe taiyaar karo...makeup khatam nahi hota inka. Aisa kya lagaati hain muh pe, ab ek hi din mein aishwarya toh ban nahi jayengi.
Is sab k baad bhi agar bhaagte bhaagte time pe pahunch gaye toh aapki toh koi planning hi nahi hai, aap toh sab casually lete ho, aapke PART D k exam clear nahi hai, Maj...k toh sab clear hain, aap staff kab clear karoge, aapki achhi city miein posting kyun nahi aati, Delhi kyun nahi posting karwa lete, aap CO kab banoge. Ab mujhe kya pata meri maa kab banunga, 1 din mein toh ban jaunga nahi. Delhi posting kara lo ab mera sasur toh defense minister laga nahi hai jo main fauj ka damaad hun....it's ridiculous yaar.'
So this was the reason for his grin - he had found his fellow-sufferers who gave him voice. But he did not know then that 'picture abhi bhi baaki thi', when the feminist in me decided to turn the coin to it's other side and pen down the reply; after all everyone has got the right to defend oneself. So here's the response to all the officers who zealously relate to the above 'heartrending' story :
ARMY WIVES KI SHAADI SHUDA ZINDAGI KA PUNCHNAMA
-----------------------------------------------
1 army wife to other after a drink..
how's your married life?
kabhi kisi ko engineering se passout hoke aanganwadi ki class attend karte dekha hai....Mujhe dekh le
Shaadi se pehle wow u cleared AIEEE, you are so beautiful, tum office aur ghar dono kaise manage kar leti ho, how did u clean those viruses, bravo girl.
Shaadi k baad
Tum pure din ghar mein karti kya ho, tumko dress pe stars lagane bhi nahi aate, aaj fir tumne wahi daal bana di, ye military presentation hai tumhari samajh m nahi aayegi, agar saal mein 6 mahine bina husband k nahi reh sakti toh mujhse shaadi hi q ki.
Sabse zyada dimaag ki dahi is AWWA ne kar rakhi hai. tumko usme jana hi padega, CO ki wife tumko bula rahi hai, senior ladies hongi jeans nahi saree pehen k jao, jawano ki wives ka khayal rakhna tumhara farz hai, CO ki wife ne kaha hai toh tumko vriksharopan project mein part lena hi padega.
Sharaab..Sharaab ki shopping khatam hi nahi hoti inki...aur ek bottle ko kabhi kholenge bhi nahi...roz dimaag chaatenge k mere salary khatam ho gayi hai tumko kaha se dun paise...aur fir CSD jaake 4 nayi bottle utha laayenge aur fir dimaag chaatenge k paise nahi hai.
Ab inke yaha koi kuber ka ped laga hua hai k roz daaru ki bottle utha laaye aur paise khatam na ho. Uske baad khana lagane mein thoda late ho jao ya subah 5 baje PT pe jaane se pehle chai na de pao toh fir inki suno, tum rehne do main bina khaaye hi chala jaunga, pehle toh meri ek phone call pe uth jaya karti thi, ab alarm bajne pe bhi nahi uth paati ho, toh kya karu pure din kitchen mein hi khadi rahu ya chaukidaar ki tarah jagti rahu.
2 ghante pehle phone karke bol diya k shaam ko party hai. Office mein baith k phone karne mein toh koi mushkil nahi hai. Office se wapas aake dekho tab pata chalega k 2 ghante mein tumhare bacho ka homework bhi karana hai, unka khana banana hai, unke kapde kal k liye laundry karne hai, tumhare party k kapde ready karne hai, tumhari uniform kal k liye ready karne hai, tumhare kutte ko khana dena hai, aur kal subah k breakfast ki taiyari karni hai...aur din raat tumhari seva karne se jo dark circles ho gaye hain ab unko chupaane k liye make up bhi na
lagaye...baad mein tum hi kahoge...Col...ki wife toh abhi bhi itni sundar lagti hain aur apni toh..
In sab k baad bhi agar bhagte bhagte time pe pahunch gaye toh..wo Col..ki wife hain jao jaake unko hello bol k aao..wo Brig..ki wife hain unse sahi se baat karna...tumne toh naak kata di...tumne Maj.. ki wife ko call kiya k nahi wo tumhare baare mein puch rahi thi..tumne meri handbook bana di k nahi mujhe aaj submit karni hai...aaj maine sabko cocktail party pe bula liya hai coz aaj saturday hai...tum aaj ek ghante mein dinner bana lo...maine bachelors ko bula liya hai...Mrs...ne pichli baar bahut achha pudding banaya tha tum waisa kab banaogi..ab mujhe kya pata main kab banaungi..ab ek din mein engineer se chef toh ban nahi jaungi...
it's ridiculous yaar.
I still sometimes ask my husband to forward this to all his whatsapp groups, on which he diligently changes the topic and asks me if I would like to have some meal cooked by him.
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| Cheerss!!!! |
P.S. : The above content is all in good humour; no offense intended.
